Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
