Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize
