billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
