Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
We are all done wearing pants today
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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