This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
