I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize
