Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
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