He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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