is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
