just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
how does that bad decision feel?
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