About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize
