hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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