theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize