I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
