The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
