so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
