Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize