You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Randomize
