she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
