So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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