dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Randomize
