I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
