i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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