i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
