Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
