If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
