i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
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