Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
