i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
