Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize