when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
