U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
