I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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