Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Randomize
