Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
