I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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