I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
