i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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