They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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