Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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