I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
Randomize
