she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize
