I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
