I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
