Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize
