i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I have aggressive nipples.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
