get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
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