did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
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