there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
