Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Edward fifth and chaser hands
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Randomize
