dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Randomize
