...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
40s are totally the cure
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize